life – The Sheeprug Pages.

Amazon returns…

Like, I suspect, most people I have mixed views regarding Amazon. On the one hand you can have practically anything you wish for delivered to your home, often the next day, with ‘free’ delivery. To make it even better, within 30 days you can return it, no questions asked. It’s a really good service.

On the other hand there is the issue of the amount of tax Amazon actually pay in this country. It’s not good – they have clever accountants! For example their European base is in Luxembourg, where different rules apply.

But what happens if the widget you’ve bought from them breaks after the 30 day period? (As happened to me recently).

Well on the face of it, the service is very poor. There’s really nothing on the website to help much; you very quickly find yourself going round in circles and getting increasingly angry and frustrated. Very often, as obviously intended, the customer gives up.

What you really want is someone to talk to. The phone number of a real person, perhaps. Well, it’s not obvious, but it can be done. The following worked for me.

Find the customer service page. This gives a range of options for things you might like help with. These simply take you to other web pages – not a lot of help.
Click on the ‘Something Else’ box. This brings up some more links, including a ‘Contact Us’ link.
Click on the ‘Contact Us’ link; this brings up a Text Chat window.
Write something like ‘I want to talk to a real person’.
Eventually it gives you the option to ‘Talk to a Customer Service Associate’. Click on this and you can request a phone call. They ask for a phone number – which they probably have anyway – and they ring you back.

By doing this I found myself talking to a very helpful Pakistani gentlemen who sorted out the problem, and arranged for a refund and a collection of the faulty item by courier the next day.

Excellent – result.

Careful on that ladder…

I read recently that people over 50 shouldn’t be allowed to use ladders. Nonsense I say – we’re the most sensible of all people – we’ve been around a bit, we’re confident, experienced and have survived long enough to not do anything stupid. In my case I’ve done lots of rock climbing, external DIY, up and down ladders, all those things that make you a reliable, capable person who doesn’t do stupid. Heights – no problem, the key is to never forget where you are. Lean too far – NO! that’s what the foolhardy do.

The trouble is, it’s all to easy to get it wrong. And as I just found out, you go from being this capable, sensible person, into being a complete dork into the blink of an eye.

It all went wrong about 4 weeks ago whilst cutting my hedge. I’d done most of it, and was actually feeling quite pleased with my self. Finally, I’d done the garden chores for the spring and I could get back onto fun things. There was just that final top bit – slightly out of reach, but OK – everything was stable, ladder fine, etc. No problem. Except, it wasn’t… I felt the ladder tip a bit, backed off, but suddenly I had the choice of riding the ladder down, or jumping off…. I jumped.

Actually, it was probably the best choice, but we’ll never know.

So I’m now lying in a heap on the grass. I could still wiggle my toes, which seemed to be a good thing and overall, I didn’t feel too bad… But it wasn’t right. I could feel it – It didn’t actually hurt much, but I knew this was SERIOUS. I’d had this before – a minor injury, like stubbing your toe, hurts. A serious one feels more… elemental, deeper, worse. I could feel the cold, clammy feeling of shock coming over me. Not good.

No phone, it was indoors – stupid! So I can’t call for help. So I crawled on my hands and knees about 10 yards across the grass to the patio. Eventually I found a piece of wood to use as a crutch. I could put some weight on my heel, but anything else was very painful. I staggered as far as the kitchen and found my phone. Hard work – this is really not good.

So now I had a dilemma – my lovely wife had a social meeting after work with some former, and much missed colleagues. If I’d rung her, she’d have missed out on this, and I’d have felt bad. So, I rang my next friend, S___, to scrounge a lift to casualty in Heath Road. She’s a former nurse, and was characteristically blunt. RING FOR AN AMBULANCE – YOU SOUND TERRIBLE! I didn’t argue, she was right – I did feel terrible. So I did as I was told and was they said it might be an hour or two.

Behind the scenes though, she was quietly playing a blinder! One by one friends in the village began to arrive. First there was St___ and his lovely wife, then D__ from next door, M___ from down the road, then S__ herself. Wonderful – I was feeling a little better and we could have had a very nice afternoon garden party under different circumstances.

Eventually the ambulance estimate became 3 hours, and Stuart offered me a lift, which I gratefully accepted.

The wait in casualty at Ipswich wasn’t too bad, and eventually an excellent nurse-practitioner stepped in and we were sorted. Heidi arrived, not impressed that I’d not told her earlier (you really can’t win, can you!!), but lovely as usual. Everybody was lovely, with the exception of the radiologist, who was horrible. Eventually everything fell into place and I was diagnosed with a ‘spiral fracture of the right fibula’.

PHUQ! I thought – as you would…. They sent me home with a temporary plaster and an appointment card for fracture clinic the next morning.

It got sillier when we got home though… We’d had a power cut, and everything was dark. So eventually, after finding a torch, we sat down at the kitchen table by candlelight and sat there with a glass of wine each, laughing at the ridiculousness of it all.

The next day at the fracture clinic I was fitted with a walker boot – a wonder of plastic and velcro – and was told probably six weeks to get back on your feet.

I’ll take that, under the circumstances. But what a bloody idiot!

So a big thankyou to all those who helped, both on the day and subsequently. We’ll fire up the barbecue and pizza oven later when I can move around a bit better, and the drinks are on us!

That day may never come…..

In the opening scene of The Godfather, the local undertaker, whose daughter has been dishonoured by some local thugs and the courts haven’t punished them appropriately, makes a deal with Don Corleone (“The Godfather”) in order to get his revenge. Essentially, he offers his ‘friendship’ and an implicit agreement to help The Godfather at a later date. As the Big Man says,

“Someday, and that day may never come, I will call upon you to do a service for me. But until that day, accept this justice as a gift on my daughter’s wedding day”.

Over the next few days the thugs do get their (very severe) justice, and later in the film the undertaker is asked to prepare Don Corleone’s own son for burial.

It’s a nasty story, but one with a serious moral: with the exception of good friends and family, people don’t generally do things for you without expecting something in return.

Which brings me on to Keir Starmer…. Now I know they’ve all done it over the years – accepting gifts and presents from supporters, that is – and in moderation there’s no harm in it, but ultimately people don’t give presents to other people without expecting something in return. This isn’t necessarily a dig at the current government since it’s an established practice, and there’s a register so Members can declare donations and gifts they receive. So technically, nobody has done anything wrong. In fact, he said as much in an answer yesterday,

“The important thing in all of this is that we follow the rules.”

Well, yes Kier, but that’s the barristers answer – the one you might give when defending a client at the bar. But the court of public opinion will think differently. What we expect is that our leaders demonstrate good judgment and set an example, rather than indulging themselves at every opportunity. The prime minister has declared over £150,000 of gifts in recent years – that’s concert tickets, football tickets, clothes, holidays etc – and it does start to look a little excessive. Especially against a backdrop of removing the Winter Fuel Allowance from some of the poorest pensioners in the country, and being a millionaire many times over already.

It’s simply the look of the thing – it’s really not good. How can he now talk with any authority about ‘Tory sleaze’, or claim that Labour is the party that represents the poor. It’s a shame, I was hoping for better.

Update 22 Sept 2022 afternoon.

Not surprizingly, Mr. Starmer isn’t the only one. Rachel Reeves, the Chancellor, has confirmed she recieved a £7,500 gift for clothes, and the education secretary, Briget Phillipson, has confirmed £14,000 for some birthday party costs and some Taylor Swift tickets.

Asked about the donations from Lord Alli, Ms Phillipson told Sky’s Sunday Morning with Trevor Phillips:

“So I received that money from Waheed Alli, who’s a long-standing Labour peer. “It was used to fund two events, all of which was declared properly and thoroughly – that’s why that information’s in the public domain. The first event was ahead of my birthday, so I was turning 40.

“I thought it was a good opportunity to get people together in a professional context – so it was journalists, trade unionists, education people, MPs and shadow Cabinet. The second event was an event that I held also, again, for Lobby journalists, for people in the education world, as part of a reception. It was in a work context.”

Yup – good one Bridget! Just curious though – did you invite any, you know, err, teachers to your ~~party~~, meeting?

Update 27th September 2024 Evening.

It’s just been announced that ‘Free Gear Kier’ (to give hime his real name) also recieved £16,000 from Labour Lord Alli: £10,000 in October 2023 and £6000 in Febuary 2024. He declared it as ‘money for his private office’.

Oh dear!